There can be both an indirect and direct way to achieve this. The reflex erection is the direct way, achieved by touching your penis to trigger the nerves in the lower part of your spinal cord and your peripheral nervous system. The psychogenic erection is the indirect way, via non-mechanical sexual stimulation (visual, for example) and sexual arousal. This activates the limbic system in your brain, sending electrical signals down to your erectile nerve centres via the lower regions of your spinal cord. The latter is why you can get both nocturnal or "morning glory" erections, rather non-erotically referred to as nocturnal penile tumescence. How romantic.
Erectile dysfunction, also known as ED or impotence, is the inability to attain or maintain an erection of the penis adequate for the sexual satisfaction of both partners. It can be devastating to the self-esteem of a man and of his partner. As many as 30 million American men are afflicted on a continuing basis, and transient episodes affect nearly all adult males. But nearly all men who seek treatment find some measure of relief.
Occasional ED is common in all men, including young and healthy men. But if you have a persistent or recurrent problem with initiating or maintaining an erection and it's causing you or your partner distress, talk to your doctor. “Lack of nighttime erections is another cause for concern, said Wang. These occurrences serve to nourish the penis with oxygen and keeping the blood supply healthy, he explained. "Young men should get four or five of these a night. If you are not getting these and you are having frequent problems with ED, you need to check in with your doctor,” he recommended.
Don't forget mental health, either! "If you are experiencing stress at work, in your relationships or at home, open up communication about these issues," notes Axe. "Try natural stress busters like spending time outdoors, taking some vacation time for yourself or seeing a therapist. You also need to make sure that you are getting enough rest every night — seven to nine hours of sleep per night."
A dating death sentence: How men perceive their ED issues also changes with age. With older men, "they've had a life of good erections to look back on," Rose Hartzell, Ph.D., EdS, an AASECT-certified sex therapist with San Diego Sexual Medicine, told Mic. But with some younger men who haven't had much opportunity to be sexually active, "they might feel cheated" out of having a good sex life.
Regular exercise and a diet rich in antioxidants is also the foundation of permanent weight control and diabetes prevention. Studies at the Duke University Diet and Fitness Center show that weight loss is strongly associated with better sexual function. Other studies show that diabetes is a major risk factor for ED, and that a healthy lifestyle prevents the disease and can restore erection function.
UW Health urologists with advanced training offer medical and surgical treatment options for men and their partners affected by erectile dysfunction. There are several different ways that erectile dysfunction can be treated. For some men, making a few healthy lifestyle changes may solve the problem. Your urologist will help determine the most effective course of treatment for your condition. 
Obesity. Obesity itself is not a risk factor for ED — but there is a connection. “The bigger concern is that obesity can lead to type 2 diabetes or vascular diseases, which are risk factors for ED,” says Montague. Morbid obesity, a term used to classify individuals who are significantly overweight, can cause hormonal changes that are triggered by excess body fat. In addition, obesity can put physical limitations on sexual intercourse. 

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Instead, bench any P-in-V action for a beat and lower the stakes by telling him you want to fool around—not as a precursor to penetrative sex but just for the fun of it, suggests Natalie Finegood Goldberg, a sex therapist in Los Angeles who specializes in erectile dysfunction therapy. If this is a hookup situation, make it clear to him that you don’t expect or need him to have an erect penis for the two of you to have a good time, Goldberg says. You can always have oral sex, make out, or do some manual stimulation—because the worst thing you can do is freeze him out.
In the long term, the best thing you can do for ED problems is “stay playful and keep the focus off getting your partner erect,” says Goldberg. Experiment with new erotic scenarios and situations, like having sex in a different room, wearing lingerie, or role-playing your fave fantasy. Oh, and don’t limit yourselves to just intercourse either (which applies to all couples, whether or not you’re dealing with ED). “The broader your definition of sex,” Goldberg says, “the more sex you can be having.”
Here is the last tip for how to keep an erection longer. Keep the amount of porn you consume in check. In 2013, it was estimated that some 30% of all Internet traffic was to porn sites. That statistic was reported in Huffington Post article on traffic to porn sites versus other major sites. At the time, this was more traffic than to Netflix, Hulu, or even Amazon. It’s clear that there are addiction risks associated with porn, but the bigger problem is how the brain begins to react to stimulation that’s right in front of you. Over time, men can begin to lose interest sexually in actual sex that isn’t as risque, interesting, or vibrant as porn.
Regular exercise for about 20 to 30 minutes a day may act as a libido enhancer and certainly will improve your overall health. "Exercising improves blood flow to all areas of your body and that includes the pelvic region where the blood vessels needed for sexual functioning are located," says Feloney. Some other ways that regular exercise can improve your sexual performance include building up your stamina, lowering your blood pressure, relieving stress, and helping you look and feel better.
Watch whatever you eat: poor diet is also the reason for weak erections. As per the research, specific eating patterns cause heart attacks due to the restricted blood flow in coronary arteries which impede blood flow to the penis. Blood flow is also required for the penis to make it erect. Some of the diets also include vegetables and fruits that have fried, fatty and even processed foods that contributed to decreasing the blood circulation throughout the whole body. Anything which is terrible for man’s heart is also wrong for his penis and gaining an erection. One can learn how to keep an erection
Don't forget mental health, either! "If you are experiencing stress at work, in your relationships or at home, open up communication about these issues," notes Axe. "Try natural stress busters like spending time outdoors, taking some vacation time for yourself or seeing a therapist. You also need to make sure that you are getting enough rest every night — seven to nine hours of sleep per night."
Remember that he is in his 40's, and that's a huge factor too. Around the age of 30, testosterone, androgen, and other hormone levels gradually begin to drop at about a rate of 1 percent. and as a direct result, by the time a man reaches 40, hormone drops cause loss of muscle mass and increased body fat. As a man reaches 45 these gradual hormone drops cause brain capacity and function to slowly regress. This, mixed with risks of genetic diseases like diabetes and high blood pressure, all take a toll on the body, especially the sex organs. Those who are physically active are at a huge advantage, as working out inhibits hormone levels, the neuromuscular system, and protein synthesis to maintain.
You may be unsurprised to learn that little has changed over the years when it comes to erections. In fact, this is probably only matched the pursuit of erectile greatness (judging by the growing column inches on the subject). But there too is a new kid on the sexual performance block: the volume of your semen – likely born out of the explosion of easily accessible online pornography and its warped portrayal of “what’s normal” in sex. Divided into two parts (one: your erection; two: your semen), here’s what you need to know about these two bedfellows...
"Stress and anxiety can adversely affect sexual performance and are common causes of erectile dysfunction,” warns Feloney. “Feelings of stress and anxiety can also lead to depression and a loss of interest in sex." It's important to get these feelings out in the open where you can deal with them. Issues that can lead to erectile dysfunction include fear from previous bad experiences with sex, family or work related stress, poor communication with your partner, and unrealistic goals and expectations.

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