Try to think of love-making as fun, not a trial. Laugh more, be more playful, and try to create opportunities for being together in situations that would be enjoyable for you both, even if sex does not occur. Most importantly, explore non-penetrative styles of eroticism. These things will help increase your sexual comfort and confidence, and reduce the pressure you currently feel to be an on-demand sex machine. You are merely human.
Medications. There are several different ED medicines that can help produce an erection, such as avanafil (Stendra), sildenafil (Viagra), tadalafil (Cialis), and vardenafil (Levitra). These medications work the same way: they relax smooth muscle and allow increased blood flow into the penis. Testosterone replacement and medications injected directly into your penis to help with erection are also common.

Relationship problems often complicate erectile dysfunction. Improving your relationship may be part of the solution. It may be a good idea to get counseling together from a sex therapist, marriage counselor, or a medical specialist. "I almost always see couples together to discuss erectile dysfunction. It often turns out that both partners have issues regarding the sexual relationship and once they are out in the open, couples can work together on a more satisfying sexual experience," says Feloney.


Instead, bench any P-in-V action for a beat and lower the stakes by telling him you want to fool around—not as a precursor to penetrative sex but just for the fun of it, suggests Natalie Finegood Goldberg, a sex therapist in Los Angeles who specializes in erectile dysfunction therapy. If this is a hookup situation, make it clear to him that you don’t expect or need him to have an erect penis for the two of you to have a good time, Goldberg says. You can always have oral sex, make out, or do some manual stimulation—because the worst thing you can do is freeze him out.
Some of the most reliable ED stats have emerged from a large data collection effort called the Massachusetts Male Aging Study. According to that data, rates of ED among men tend to correlate with their age bracket, says Tobias Köhler, M.D., chief of the Division of Male Infertility at Southern Illinois University. “Roughly 40 percent of men in their 40s suffer from ED, 50 percent in their 50s, etc.,” he says.

How many times does a man get erect in a day?


Erectile dysfunction is no laughing matter. And although it is not an easy thing to talk about, there are trained professionals who can give you good advice about what may be the cause of your current predicament. Many men like to talk about sex, but like women, they may find it harder to talk about sex when it is not going well. You won’t be judged or talked about at BPAS. We are here to help you with some of the more private things in life.

Smoking and a diet high in animal fat (sausage at breakfast, pizza for lunch, burgers for dinner) are hell on the cardiovascular system. They fill the bloodstream with oxygen ions (“free radicals”) that injure the artery walls and spur formation of fatty, cholesterol-rich deposits, “plaques.” Over time, plaques grow and narrow the arteries, restricting blood flow. When plaques affect the arteries in the heart, the result is heart disease, in the genitals, erection impairment. Studies show that compared with the general population, smokers suffer much more erectile dysfunction (ED). Other studies show that as cholesterol levels increase, so does risk of ED.


"Surprisingly, up until the 1980's, most sex experts held the Freudian view that weak erections were caused by deep-seated, unconscious neuroses or psychological problems," she explains. "This view has now widely been rejected by professionals in the field of sexuality and it's now understood that erection problems that stem from deep psychological problems are the exception, not the rule. A majority of weak erections are caused by a combination of sexual misinformation, relationship problems, depression and other life stresses."

Condom troubles. Can the simple act of putting on a condom cause so much stress that it actually leads to erectile dysfunction? Sure it can — in fact, one recent survey of 234 young men conducted by the Children's Memorial Hospital in Chicago found that 25 percent had lost an erection while putting on a condom. “Putting on a condom requires a break from stimulation, and when it is on, it can reduce sensation,” says Dr. Montague.
So not only are erectile problems common, they're nothing for you or your special friend to be freaked out about. Check out the nine most common reasons that dudes sometimes can't get it up, and get ready to become the soothing voice of reason the next time the guy you're with has a hard time pitching his tent in your happy valley. Everything (and every penis) is gonna be fine!

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